Tag Archives: selling an idea creatively

Cynical bollocks, and so’s the latest branding exercise from Abercrombie & Fitch

I enjoy reading Kristen Lamb’s blog and I have just been reading her very interesting post about this.

Oh deary me. I know they do remind us of their marketing strategy every now and again but I really thought the human race had got beyond this.

It’s great to see that one of America’s oldest established businesses is run by people of such depth. Clearly there is not enough crap in the bollocksphere already so numb-nuts there has had to spew out more.

Mwah ha hahargh! Calling all ‘cool, good looking people’. Lord in heaven, is he serious? How many teenagers do you know, even the ones that are, who believe they’re cool and good looking? Yeh… hmm… have you someone in mind? Mmm and what are they like? And when you were at school; did you know anyone who believed they were cool and good looking? Mmm and what were they like? Snortle. Can you remember? I bet you can. That’s right, in two out of three schools I went to, they were a bunch of total gits.

So that’s A&F, then, apparently; made for wankers by plonkers! Oh but only thin wankers under a certain height, because tall people often need larger sizes than a size 10, even a generous American size 10, because… shock horror, they’re bigger.

Apparently some people are hailing this marketing as genius. Just goes to show that the difference between ‘genius’ and ‘bollocks’ is often nothing more than perception.

Seriously though, is that smart marketing? Well… let me just put my brand manager’s hat on for a moment. There. Hmm, give me a moment to think about that.

I’ve thought about it.


It’s not what they’re doing, loads of clothes companies aim at the teen market by keeping the sizes small, it’s just that there’s something really not right about that schpiel. Then again, I don’t fit the demographic. Since I’ve never had a figure like an ironing board, not even when I was a teenager, I’ve never troubled A&F with my custom, the trousers were alright but I’ve never fitted my boobs into a size 10 top… But hang on, do you remember size 16 supermodel Sophie Dahl? Was she not ‘beautiful’ enough for A&F?

Obviously not.

So there we are. Not only is it a wanky theory but it doesn’t even hold water.

Being ‘exclusionary’ is not alright. It’s being a cunt, if you’ll pardon my French.

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Filed under General Wittering


I liked these people, MCA… but despite being listed on querytracker.net as looking for my genre, the agent mentioned in the listing is not actually looking for sci-fi or fantasy.

So… querytracker.net gets a big thumbs down from me… one to avoid unless you’re in the US I suspect.

Looking for a new agency to submit to but not doing too well… many, when asked, express an aversion to fantasy… maybe I should pitch it as a comedy and forget to add the word ‘fantasy’, that’s a bit cheeky though.  Better to be straight.  And although it’s crap that there are so few agents dealing with my genre in some respects, on the up side, the fewer there are, the sooner I’ll know if I’m stuffed.

I really would love to find an agent though.  You know, a real one.  Someone who could help me hone my work, somebody who could open my eyes and turn me from a reasonable writer into a really good one… But at the same time, I’m kind of intimidated… the more agency websites I research, the more Oxbridge  English graduates, with MAs I find… I can’t see these literary rocket scientists going for an eccentric middle-aged, middle-class Mum with a bad Art History degree and a huge pussy* cat.  Hmm… it’s going to be a long search.

Never mind.  My submission to Snow books is good to go… what a pity my book isn’t (guffaw).  No, I’m not that disorganised, I just need to finish the last chunk of editing which is marked up already.  Then I can send it.

Perhaps it’s time to write another free e-short.  I have had 39 downloads in a month… not going to set the world on fire but not bad and I suspect it won’t get much better unless I keep up some momentum… wondering if I can manage one a month… or perhaps I should do a reading and sell it as an aural book.  That would be a scream.  I am a massive ham!

On that subject… the speaky thing, I mean not being a monster ham; since there’s a lot of speech in my novel ( “is it a play?” one agent asked me) I’m toying with adapting Few are Chosen for radio… just following the models of people who have succeeded at writing varietals of the stuff I do.

Well… it’s a thought.

* This joke was brought to you by the Mrs Slocombe appreciation society.

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Filed under Finding an agent, General Wittering, Marketing Ideas

Marketing my book

Hmm… well on the advice of my sister in-law who is wise in the ways of publishing, I have set up a blog to go with my novel.

She also suggested myspace and facebook pages would be good and they would, my target audience is young adults and they love all that stuff.  However,  Myspace and Facebook are not intuitive things to me so will take hours I don’t have to set up.  A blog on the other hand… well, yeh, that comes naturally to me!

So… in order to cover as many aspects of the world in which my characters live as I possibly can, in one place, I have set up a blog as the Free Yarthian Broadcasting Corporation.  That allows plenty of scope for geography, history (an education area), religion, politics and even competitions.

I’m thinking maybe it should be Yarthan, now, after writing a book and calling it Yarthian to myself for about 10 years!  Never mind, this is an experiment, the blog was named in a hurry and it’s far too long winded to use long term.

So far you’ll find a handful of posts.  Pictures are tricky with a 10 month old I have very little of the right creative drive for art… never mind, it’ll come back eventually.  In the meantime the blog is there to do three things.

  1. Pique the interest of my target market in a Lilly Allen kind of way but without plot spoilers (yeh, I know but you know what they say about the lottery, you have to be in it to win it).
  2. Amuse me and keep my brain wired into my writing project and writing, even when it’s coddled like a hide n’ squeak egg.
  3. Show publishers that I am willing to put in work marketing my book.

Well there you go.  Let me know what you think.  You can find it here.

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Filed under Marketing Ideas